Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
DECEMBER 7, 2011
FreeWillAstrology.com
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Find me on Twitter at twitter.com/FreeWillAstro
Find me on Facebook at bit.ly/BrezFB
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My book PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA
is available at Amazon: bit.ly/Pronoia
or Powells: bit.ly/PronoiaPowells
Here's an excerpt:
Take some paper and write "I will do everything in my power
to attract all the help and resources I need as I accomplish the
following goal." Then compose a declaration that crisply
describes exactly what satisfying, growth-inducing experience
you want most in life -- and are willing to work hard for and
even change yourself to attract, if necessary. Keep copies of
this magic formula under your pillow for at least 22 days.
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Mercury retrograding you? As you carry out your response, consider
these meditations: bit.ly/v4V9en
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All I ask of you: Be my slow-motion dance. Be my birthday earthquake.
Be my spiral marble staircase in the middle of a Vermont meadow.
Be my handstand on a barstool, my whirlwind week in clown school,
my joke shared with a Siberian shaman while shopping for T-shirts
at Sears. Be my last because . . . . [HEAR the rest: bit.ly/vCuGv6]
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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:
UNKNOWN HELPERS ARE PLOTTING IN OUR BEHALF
Recent Discoveries That Could Revolutionize medicine
tinyurl.com/bqerol5
PRONOIAC PRANKS ARE GOOD MEDICINE
Improv Everywhere: The shared experience of absurdity. Bizarre,
hilarious, and unexpected public scenes that bring people together.
tinyurl.com/7fuy39f
GET YOUR MINIMUM DAILY REQUIREMENT OF BEAUTY
Feast Your Eyes
tinyurl.com/3lqkq96
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning December 8
Copyright 2011 by Rob Brezsny
FreeWillAstrology.com
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Harvey Ball was a commercial artist who dreamed up the iconic
image of the smiley face. He whipped it out in ten minutes one
day in 1963. Unfortunately for him, he didn't trademark or copyright
his creation, and as a result made only $45 from it, even as it
became an archetypal image used millions of times all over the
world. Keep his story in the back of your mind during the coming
weeks, Sagittarius. I have a feeling you will be coming up with
some innovative moves or original stuff, and I would be sad if
you didn't get proper credit and recognition for your work.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
There are 501 possible solutions to your current dilemma. At
least ten of them would bring you a modicum of peace, a bit of
relief, and a touch of satisfaction. Most of the rest wouldn't
feel fantastic, but would at least allow you to mostly put the
angst behind you and move on with your life. But only one of those
potential fixes can generate a purgative and purifying success
that will extract the greatest possible learning from the situation
and give you access to all of the motivational energy it has to
offer. Be very choosy.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
The quality of your consciousness is the single most influential
thing about you. It's the source of the primary impact you make
on other human beings. It changes every situation you interact
with, sometimes subtly and other times dramatically. So here's
my first question: How would you characterize the quality of your
consciousness? The answer is complicated, of course. But there
must be eight to ten words that capture the essence of the vibes
you beam out wherever you go. Now comes my second question: Are
you satisfied with the way you contribute to life on earth with
the quality of your consciousness? It's an excellent time to contemplate
these primal matters.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):
Some martial artists unleash a sharp percussive shout as they
strike a blow or make a dramatic move -- a battle cry that helps
channel their will into an explosive, concise expression of force.
The Japanese term for this is kiai. A few women's tennis
players invoke a similar sound as they smack the ball with their
racquet. Maria Sharapova holds the record for loudest shriek at
105 decibels. The coming weeks would be an excellent time for
you to call on your own version of kiai, Pisces. As you
raise your game to the next level, it would make perfect sense
for you to get your entire body involved in exerting some powerful,
highly-focused master strokes.
ARIES (March 21-April 19):
What's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen in your life?
To answer that question is your first assignment. It's OK if you
can't decide between the three or four most beautiful things.
What's important is to keep visions of those amazements dancing
in the back of your mind for the next few days. Play with them
in your imagination. Feel the feelings they rouse in you as you
muse about the delights they have given you. Regard them as beacons
that will attract other ravishing marvels into your sphere. Now
here's your second assignment: Be alert for and go hunting for
a new "most beautiful thing."
TAURUS (April 20-May 20):
"Not to dream boldly may turn out to be irresponsible,"
said educator George Leonard. I certainly think that will be true
for you in the coming months, Taurus. In my astrological opinion,
you have a sacred duty not only to yourself, but also to the people
you care about, to use your imagination more aggressively and
expressively as you contemplate what might lie ahead for you.
You simply cannot afford to remain safely ensconced within your
comfort zone, shielded from the big ideas and tempting fantasies
that have started calling and calling and calling to you.
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GEMINI (May 21-June 20):
Researchers at the University of Oregon claim that in certain
circumstances, they can make water flow uphill (tinyurl.com/UphillFlow).
I'm not qualified to evaluate their evidence, but I do know that
in the coming week you will have the power to accomplish the metaphorical
equivalent of what they say they did. Don't squander this magic
on trivial matters, please, Gemini. Use it to facilitate a transformation
that's important to your long-term well-being.
CANCER (June 21-July 22):
"Dear Rob: Is there any way to access your horoscope archives
going back to 1943? I'm writing a novel about World War II and
need to see your astrological writings from back then. - Creative
Cancerian." Dear Creative: To be honest, I wasn't writing
horoscopes back in 1943, since I wasn't anywhere near being born
yet. On the other hand, I give you permission to make stuff up
for your novel and say I wrote it back in 1943. Most of you Cancerians
have good imaginations about the past, and you're currently going
through a phase when that talent is amplified. While you're tinkering
with my history, have fun with yours, too. This is an excellent
time for members of your tribe to breath new life and fresh spin
into a whole slew of your own personal memories.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):
At Chow.com, food critic L. Nightshade
gathered "The 78 Most Annoying Words to Read in a Restaurant
Review." Among the worst offenders: "meltingly tender,"
"yummilicious," "crazy delicious," "orgasmic,"
"I have seen God," "symphony of flavors,"
and "party in your mouth." I understand the reluctance
of any serious wordsmith to resort to such predictable language
in crafting an appraisal of restaurant fare, but I don't mind
borrowing it to hint at your immediate future. What you experience
may be more like a "party in your head" than a "party
in your mouth," and "crazy delicious" may describe
events and adventures rather than flavors, per se. But I think
you're in for a yummilicious time.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
In "Nan You're a Window Shopper," British recording
artist Lily Allen sings, "The bottom feels so much better
than the top." She means it ironically; the person she's
describing in the song is neurotic and insecure. But in using
that declaration as a theme for your horoscope this week -- the
bottom feels so much better than the top -- I mean it sincerely.
What you have imagined as being high, superior, or uppermost may
turn out to be mediocre, illusory, or undesirable. Conversely,
a state of affairs that you once considered to be low, beneath
your notice, or not valuable could become rather interesting.
And if you truly open your mind to the possibilities, it may even
evolve into something that's quite useful.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Emily Rubin invited authors to write about a specific theme for
a literary reading she organized in New York last September: stains.
"What is your favorite stain?" she asked prospective
participants, enticing them to imagine a stain as a good thing,
or at least as an interesting twist. Included in her own list
were chocolate, candle wax, lipstick, grass, mud, wine, and tomato
sauce. What are yours, Libra? This would be an excellent time
to sing the praises of your best-loved or most provocative blotches,
splotches, and smirches -- and have fun stirring up some new ones.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Mickey Mouse is a Scorpio, born November 18, 1928. Bugs Bunny
is a Leo, coming into the world on July 27, 1940. In their long
and storied careers, these two iconic cartoon heroes have made
only one joint appearance. It was in the film Who Framed Roger
Rabbit. They got equal billing and spoke the same number
of words. I'm predicting that a comparable event will soon take
place in your world, Scorpio: a conjunction of two stars, a blend
of two strong flavors, or a coming together of iconic elements
that have never before mixed. Sounds like you're in for a splashy
time.
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HOMEWORK:
Show me why I might enjoy following you on Twitter by sending
some of your sample tweets to Truthrooster@gmail.com.
And find me on Twitter at twitter.com/FreeWillAstro.
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2011 Rob Brezsny
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