I was working with a client who was regretful that he has been working in the same company for almost twenty years and has never been promoted despite continuing education and great effort. With some questioning, he realized that each time there was a job posting, he delayed submitting his resume or missed the deadline. Wondering more about that, he realized that his fear was that if he got a promotion, they would discover his weaknesses. I pointed out that they already know everything about him and his work. While it sounds so simple, it was a revelation. Far too often, we create fictional ideas out of our fears that then hold us back. Usually, we want to blame someone or something external instead of accepting that we are limiting ourselves.
Some of the most common examples of limiting beliefs (that we actually believe are true):
I'm too old to change.
I don't have the right experience.
I'm not smart enough.
If I do this, then.... some consequence will occur.
I don't deserve... (I'm not good enough....)
I couldn't possibly (write a book, sing in front of people, play the lead role, lead a group, etc.)
When reading these few examples, we can see that they are not facts. They are ideas that we have created that hold us back.
When we believe they are the truth, it keeps us from trying, from growing, from experiencing, etc.
INVITATION TO EXPERIMENT
The quote by Robert Schuller comes to mind "What would you attempt if you knew you couldn't fail?"
If you think about it, there is no truthful answer because we can't possibly know how something will turn out until we actually go ahead. The point is that it allows us to wonder, to imagine, and take what we think is a risk because it's something that we truly want and have been too afraid to consider.
What will it take for you to 'go for it' - to reach beyond what you believe you can do?
Very best regards,
marion@lifecoachinggroup.com
(c) 2004-12. All rights reserved. Marion Franklin, www.lifecoachinggroup.com
Comments? Feedback? lllfeedback@lifecoachinggroup.com
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