13 Bits Of Wisdom From Women At Commencement 2014
The Huffington Post - Amanda Duberman (Posted: 05/27/2014)
(The article quotes 13 speeches, and I've narrowed it down to 6 with a common theme.)
My comments follow the quotes.
Cecile Richards: Risks make the best opportunities -- so take them often.
"If you hold out for an invitation, chances are good you'll miss the party. And by the party I mean life. Growing up, Mom always told me: The answer to life is yes. This is the only life you have so make the most of it. Take every opportunity and risk you can. You'll only regret the things you didn't do because you were afraid to try." (Barnard College)
You can probably think of a few things you didn't go after or even believe you could achieve or do and therefore still sometimes think about the 'what if' I had tried. Sometimes it's simply the possibility of not getting instead of the possibility of getting something that holds us back. And realistically, they are both 50/50 no matter what the odds.
Katie Couric: You can't be criticized for hard work.
"When I became the anchor of the CBS Evening News, the first woman to do so alone, the critics were harsh and unrelenting. They complained about my hair, my makeup, my clothes, my delivery, even the way I held my hands. Some claimed I lacked gravitas, which I've decided is Latin for 'testicles.' It wasn't easy. But I kept my head down and I stayed focused because I loved the work ... The best antidote to the naysayers you'll surely encounter along the way is to stay strong, work hard, and put in the time." (American University and Trinity College)
and
Sandra Bullock: It's the joy that stays with you.
"Raise the bar higher. It is noisy out there and for some reason, people want to see you fail. That's not your problem, that is their problem. I only remember the moments where I tried beyond what I thought I could do and I do not remember the failures because I didn't ... Go find your joy. It's what you're going to remember in the end. It's not the worry, it's not the what-ifs. It's the joy that stays with you." (Warren Easton Charter High School)
There will always be naysayers - and just knowing that as a fact can help you rise above all the negativity and if nothing else, go for what YOU want.
It's a lot more rewarding and more fun to think about the things you decided to go for and achieved despite the odds, than the things you missed or the time spent doubting and not going for them.
Jennifer Lee, Director of Frozen - Ban self-doubt.
"While I am someone who stands before you so far from perfect -- there isn't a subway line to perfect from where I live -- I am enough. If I've learned one thing, it's that self-doubt is one of the most destructive forces. It makes you defensive instead of open, reactive instead of active. Self-doubt is consuming and cruel. And my hope today is that we can all collectively agree to ban it ... Think about all the crazy ways you feel different from everyone else. And now take the judgment out of that. And what you are left with is such a wholly dynamic, inspiring character who could lead an epic story." (University of New Hampshire)
Self-doubt is part of human nature. There comes a time when you can cave and get sucked into the downward spiral of self-doubt. And, there comes a time when you can look at it squarely and realize it's the ONLY thing in your way.
Nancy Peolosi: Know your power.
"Remember this: with the knowledge gained here, you can do anything. You may not be aware of the opportunities that await you, but when those opportunities present themselves, be ready. Be idealistic, be pragmatic, be ready. That's a lesson I've taken to heart in my own experience. Although with my generation, I was inspired by John F. Kennedy, I had no idea I'd go from the kitchen to Congress, from homemaker to House Speaker... My wish is that you know your power to light the future with your ideals and your optimism." (University of California at Berkeley)
and
Susan Wojcicki, YouTube CEO: The "right" choice doesn't always exist.
"Life doesn't offer you the perfect opportunity at the perfect time. Opportunities come when you least expect them ... Rarely are opportunities presented to you in a perfect way in a nice little box with a yellow bow on top. 'Here, open it, it's perfect. You'll love it.' Opportunities -- the good ones -- are messy, confusing and hard to recognize. They're risky. They challenge you. But things happen so fast because our world is changing so much, you have to make decisions without perfect information. You have to make decisions based on the fact that the world is going to continue to change -- on the belief that the status quo will be supplanted by something better." (Johns Hopkins University)
Not only do you miss opportunities (when one door closes, you stay focused on that one instead of the one opening in front of you), sometimes they just seem so big, or scary, or impossible. That doesn't mean that they aren't coming at the perfect time and meant for you. It simply means that the self-doubt is winning the battle.
INVITATION TO EXPERIMENT
Go for something you really want despite the odds so you won't have regrets.
Very best regards,
marion@lifecoachinggroup.com
(c) 2004-14. All rights reserved. Marion Franklin, www.lifecoachinggroup.com
Comments? Feedback? lllfeedback@lifecoachinggroup.com
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