When the stuff hits the fan http://ezezine.com
Welcome to Issue No 2 – and hey, thank you for subscribing! Do pass it
on to anyone who might benefit.
Wordcount: 605
Average time to read: 3 minutes
Yesterday we heard that one of our very dear friends, a vibrant and
dynamic woman of barely 50, has been diagnosed with Parkinson’s
disease. What a whammy. This family has really been through the mill in
the last few years, with sudden bereavement, illness, change, and just
stuff. And I know they will cope and our friend will come through it no
matter what. She is already looking ahead and figuring out how to
augment the allopathic (traditional Western medical model) treatment
with holistic approaches, and planning her next holiday. What a spirit!
This got me thinking again about how some people just cope, no matter
what. And of others who don’t – who fall apart with much less
provocation.
I’m reminded of Viktor E Frankl, holocaust survivor who died in 1997 at
the age of 92. He wrote an amazing little book in 1963 called Man’s
Search for Meaning, narrating his quite horrific experiences and the
personal philosophy that helped him carry on without the poison of
bitterness. He developed an existential school of thought called
logotherapy. Here’s a quote from his book:
"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what
life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of
life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being
questioned by life - daily and hourly. Our answer must consist, not in
talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life
ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to
its problems and to fulfil the tasks which it constantly sets for each
individual."
Frankl also says, "Everything can be taken from a person but ...the
last of the human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set
of circumstances ..." So what is all of this pointing to?
A resilience of spirit, in my humble opinion – endurance and courage
big time. Life ain’t easy, there will be setbacks and disappointments,
hurdles and hurts. And there are some ways of handling these that have
been proven to be more beneficial than others. Let’s look at one
overarching quality, that of resilience.
The dictionary defines resilient thus: (of a substance) recoiling;
springing back; resuming its original shape after bending, stretching,
compression etc, and (of a person) readily recovering from shock,
depression etc, buoyant.
In order to build the capacity of resilience, you need to develop it
over time. It isn’t a one-shot wonder. So how can you build this
ability and be curious and optimistic about the future, even when faced
with adversity?
Three top tips for building resilience:
1. Your own story: think of a time when you did something totally
against the odds, when you faced the impossible and made it work for
you. Call up those attitudes, actions and feelings right now. Just
remember how powerful you can be!
2. Mental flexibility: What’s your familiar pattern of response
when faced with a challenge? Notice it. Is it the most productive? Does
it give you the results you want? If not, expand this comfort zone
literally and mentally. What one thing can you start doing differently?
3. Self care: extreme self-care is the order of the day in order
to build resilience! Sure, you might work ‘oil rig shifts’, but how do
you balance that? How much attention do you give to nutrition, personal
rest and renewal strategies and times to be intentionally still? What
can you do this week to take care of your most important asset –
yourself?
Until next time, my warmest wishes as you top up your reservoir of
Resilience!
Coach Z
Zarine Jacob
Passionate about people development!
www.passionfruitcoaching.com
www.CoachZee.blogspot.com