Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
March 7, 2018
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See a pretty version of this newsletter: http://bit.ly/YouBuildMagic
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I invite you to nurture a goal that stretches your possibilities and opens
your mind . . . a wild hope whose pursuit makes you smarter and stronger
even if you never fully accomplish it.
I invite you to have an improbable quest playing at the edge of your
imagination: a heroic task that provokes deep thoughts and noble
passions even if it incites smoldering torment . . . an extravagant dream
that's a bit farfetched but not entirely insane.
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YOUR MONKEY MIND'S FAKE NEWS
Using our fears and superstitions and delusions as fuel, our monkey minds
are churning out fake news about ourselves all the time.
One possible remedy: Treat our monkey mind's fake news with the same
healthy, exuberant skepticism we do toward politicians' and media's fake
news.
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NEITHER ROSE-COLORED NOR CRAP-COLORED GLASSES
"I've found a nice balance," writes EarthMover, "between living like
someone who has overdosed on delusional optimism and someone who
thinks everything and everyone sucks. I can see things as they really are
instead of through either rose-colored glasses or crap-colored glasses.
"That means I can cultivate true objectivity, not the fake cynical kind. I
free myself from negative emotional biases that used to cloud my ability
to see the partially hidden beauty all around me.
"At the same time, I'm not addicted to the idea that I should be eternally
happy and blithe and sweet. When the dark moods descend on me, I trust
them. I know they are openings into equally sacred perceptions and
insights."
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WELCOME TO THE BEAUTY AND TRUTH LAB
Welcome to the Beauty and Truth Lab. We're coming to you live from
your repressed memories of paradise, reminding you that you can have
anything you need if you will just ask for it in an unselfish way.
Welcome to the end of your nightmares, beauty and truth fans!
The world is young, your soul is free, and a naked celebrity is dying to talk
to you about your most intimate secrets right now.
Just kidding.
In fact, the world is young, your soul is free, and at any moment you will
feel a flood of ecstatic compassion for salamanders, oak trees, clouds,
toasters, convenience store clerks, and even the ocean itself.
I'm your host. My name is the Sacred Janitor at the Edge of Time, and I'm
proud to announce that this is a perfect moment.
It's a perfect moment for many reasons, but especially because you are
on the verge of finally figuring out exactly what it is you really want more
than anything else.
Bravo! Viva! Whoopee! Oooo Eureka! Hallelujah! Abracadabra!
Bravo! Viva! Whoopee! Oooo Eureka! Hallelujah! Abracadabra!
The Beauty and Truth Lab's experiments are brought to you by the pine
trees whose seeds are so tightly compacted within their protective
covering that only the intense heat of a forest fire can free them and
allow them to sprout.
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Hear this welcome message as a song: http://bit.ly/LoveLab
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THE CRUX OF THE FLUX
"Dear Rob: I sure don't like so much God stuff mixed into my horoscopes.
Can you cut it out, please? I understand it's common for the desperate
masses to believe in an Ultra Being, but you? Pul-lease. You're smarter
than that. I just can't abide all the 'Divine Wow' and 'Cackling Goddess'
nonsense that you dispense; it doesn't jibe with the practical, sensible,
unsuperstitious, non-mushy world that I hold dear -- and that I see
represented mostly accurately in your horoscopes. -Sally Skeptic."
Dear Sally: I can't accommodate you. You will have to keep dealing with
the cognitive dissonance that arises from reading the oracles of a "smart"
person who also has an intimate relationship with the Amazing Everything.
Just so you're clear about how I perceive the Living Intelligent
Consciousness That Pervades Every Cubic Inch of the Universe: It is the
interplay of the Supernal Hermaphrodites: the Divine Wow mistakenly
called "God" and the Blooming HaHa mistakenly called "Goddess."
More precisely, it is the Torrential and Torturous Ecstasy spawned anew
every nanosecond by the glide of the Divine Wow's virile eternity against
the Blooming HaHa's voluptuous infinity. It is the Cosmic F*** that
recreates the universe again and again in every nanosecond.
Here's my place in that mystery: I aspire to locate myself in the crux of
the flux of the Cosmic F***.
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The preceding five blips are excerpts from my book
*PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA*
It's available at Amazon: http://bit.ly/Pronoia
or Powells: http://bit.ly/PronoiaPowells
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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:
Activists Launch Voter Registration Drive At 'Black Panther' Screenings
https://tinyurl.com/yddordef
Americans support various forms of gun control, often by overwhelming
margins.
https://tinyurl.com/ybo8hbe2
Actor Emma Watson donates £1m to anti-harassment campaign.
https://tinyurl.com/yapharuw
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They aren't advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES:
Truthrooster@gmail.com.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning March 8
Copyright 2018 by Rob Brezsny
http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): According to my assessment of the
astrological omens, you're in a favorable phase to gain more power over
your fears. You can reduce your susceptibility to chronic anxieties. You
can draw on the help and insight necessary to dissipate insidious doubts
that are rooted in habit but not based on objective evidence. I don't want
to sound too melodramatic, my dear Pisces, but THIS IS AN AMAZING
OPPORTUNITY! YOU ARE POTENTIALLY ON THE VERGE OF AN
UNPRECEDENTED BREAKTHROUGH! In my opinion, nothing is more
important for you to accomplish in the coming weeks than this inner
conquest.
ARIES (March 21-April 19): The men who work on offshore oil rigs
perform demanding, dangerous tasks on a regular basis. If they make
mistakes, they may get injured or befoul the sea with petroleum. As you
might guess, the culture on these rigs has traditionally been macho, stoic,
and hard-driving. But in recent years, that has changed at one company.
Shell Oil's workers in the U.S. were trained by Holocaust survivor Claire
Nuer to talk about their feelings, be willing to admit errors, and soften
their attitudes. As a result, the company's safety record has improved
dramatically. If macho dudes toiling on oil rigs can become more
vulnerable and open and tenderly expressive, so can you, Aries. And now
would be a propitious time to do it.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): How will you celebrate your upcoming climax
and culmination, Taurus? With a howl of triumph, a fist pump, and three
cartwheels? With a humble speech thanking everyone who helped you
along the way? With a bottle of champagne, a gourmet feast, and
spectacular sex? However you choose to mark this transition from one
chapter of your life story to the next chapter, I suggest that you include
an action that will help the next chapter get off to a rousing start. In your
ritual of completion, plant seeds for the future.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): On April 23, 1516, the Germanic duchy of
Bavaria issued a decree. From that day forward, all beer produced had to
use just three ingredients: water, barley, and hops. Ever since then, for
the last 500+ years, this edict has had an enduring influence on how
German beer is manufactured. In accordance with astrological factors, I
suggest that you proclaim three equally potent and systemic directives of
your own. It's an opportune time to be clear and forceful about how you
want your story to unfold in the coming years.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): What's your most frustrating flaw? During the
next seven weeks, you will have enhanced power to diminish its grip on
you. It's even possible you will partially correct it or outgrow it. To take
maximum advantage of this opportunity, rise above any covert tendency
you might have to cling to your familiar pain. Rebel against the attitude
described by novelist Stephen King: "It's hard to let go. Even when what
you're holding onto is full of thorns, it's hard to let go. Maybe especially
then."
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In his book *Whistling in the Dark,* author
Frederick Buechner writes that the ancient Druids took "a special interest
in in-between things like mistletoe, which is neither quite a plant nor quite
a tree, and mist, which is neither quite rain nor quite air, and dreams,
which are neither quite waking nor quite sleep." According to my reading
of the astrological omens, in-between phenomena will be your specialty in
the coming weeks. You will also thrive in relationship to anything that
lives in two worlds or that has paradoxical qualities. I hope you'll exult in
the educational delights that come from your willingness to be teased and
mystified.
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YOU NEED MAGIC EVERY DAY
Every day, you have to wade through a relentless surge of soul-less facts.
The experience tends to shut down your sense of wonder.
Every day, you're over-exposed to cynical narratives that have been
sucked free of delight and mystery. That's why you have to make such
strenuous efforts to keep your world enchanted.
I like to think I can contribute to the sacred cause of feeding your sense
of wonder and enchantment. In fact, that's one of my prime motivations
for offering you the free weekly horoscopes you read in this newsletter.
If you ever want more of that good stuff, and think it's worth paying for,
please consider trying out my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES. They're
four-to-five-minute meditations on the current state of your destiny.
To listen to your Expanded Audio Horoscope online, go to
http://RealAstrology.com.
Register and/or log in through the main page.
You can also listen over the phone by calling 1-877-873-4888.
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The cost is $6 per sign on the Web (discounts available for bulk
purchases), or $1.99 per minute by phone.
The Expanded Audio Horoscopes work on most smart phones and tablets.
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"I always feel like I know myself better after listening to your audio
'scopes."
-June R., Austin, TX
"Your audio horoscopes calm me down when I'm too manic and pep me up
when I'm down."
-Arthur T., Cleveland, OH
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VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The English word "velleity" refers to an empty
wish that has no power behind it. If you feel a longing to make a
pilgrimage to a holy site, but can't summon the motivation to actually do
so, you are under the spell of velleity. Your fantasy of communicating
with more flair and candor is a velleity if you never initiate the practical
steps to accomplish that goal. Most of us suffer from this weakness at
one time or another. But the good news, Virgo, is that you are primed to
overcome your version of it during the next six weeks. Life will conspire
to assist you if you resolve to turn your wishy-washy wishes into potent
action plans -- and then actually carry out those plans.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In the 2002 film *Spiderman,* there's a scene
where the character Mary Jane slips on a spilled drink as she carries a tray
full of food through a cafeteria. Spiderman, disguised as his alter ego
Peter Parker, makes a miraculous save. He jumps up from his chair and
catches Mary Jane before she falls. Meanwhile, he grabs her tray and uses
it to gracefully capture her apple, sandwich, carton of milk, and bowl of
jello before they hit the floor. The filmmakers say they didn't use CGI to
render this scene. The lead actor, Tobey Maguire, allegedly accomplished
it in real life -- although it took 156 takes before he finally mastered it. I
hope you have that level of patient determination in the coming weeks,
Libra. You, too, can perform a small miracle if you do.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Scorpio mathematician Benoît Mandelbrot
was a connoisseur of "the art of roughness" and "the uncontrolled
element in life." He liked to locate and study the hidden order in
seemingly chaotic and messy things. "My life seemed to be a series of
events and accidents," he said. "Yet when I look back I see a pattern." I
bring his perspective to your attention, Scorpio, because you are entering
a phase when the hidden order and secret meanings of your life will
emerge into view. Be alert for surprising hints of coherence.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): I suspect that in July and August you
will be invited to commune with rousing opportunities and exciting
escapades. But right now I'm advising you to channel your intelligence
into well-contained opportunities and sensible adventures. In fact, my
projections suggest that your ability to capitalize fully on the future's
rousing opportunities and exciting escapades will depend on how well you
master the current crop of well-contained opportunities and sensible
adventures. Making the most of today's small pleasures will qualify you to
harvest bigger pleasures later.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If you saw the animated film *The Lion
King,* you may have been impressed with the authenticity of the lions'
roars and snarls. Did the producers place microphones in the vicinity of
actual lions? No. Voice actor Frank Welker produced the sounds by
growling and yelling into a metal garbage can. I propose this as a useful
metaphor for you in the coming days. First, I hope it inspires you to
generate a compelling and creative illusion of your own -- an illusion that
serves a good purpose. Second, I hope it alerts you to the possibility that
other people will be offering you compelling and creative illusions --
illusions that you should engage with only if they serve a good purpose.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I do a lot of self-editing before I publish
what I write. My horoscopes go through at least three drafts before I
unleash them on the world. While polishing the manuscript of my first
novel, I threw away over a thousand pages of stuff that I had worked on
very hard. In contrast to my approach, science fiction writer Harlan Ellison
dashed off one of his award-winning stories in a single night, and
published it without making any changes to the first draft. As you work in
your own chosen field, Aquarius, I suspect that for the next three weeks
you will produce the best results by being more like me than Ellison.
Beginning about three weeks from now, an Ellison-style strategy might be
more warranted.
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Homework: What would the people who love you best say is the most
important thing for you to learn? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.
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Submissions sent to Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
or in response to "homework assignments" may be
published in a variety of formats at Rob Brezsny's discretion,
including but not limited to newsletters, books, the Free Will
Astrology column, and Free Will Astrology website. We reserve
the right to edit submissions for length, style, and content.
Requests for anonymity will be honored. We are not responsible for
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2018 Rob Brezsny
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