Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter http://ezezine.com
Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
December 14, 2011
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See a pretty version of this newsletter: http://bit.ly/twPBPJ
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*PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA*
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* and a lust for justice that's leavened with a knack for comedy, keeping
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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:
MILLIONS OF HEROES
Some of 2011's Many Heroes
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German Village Produces 321% More Energy Than It Needs!
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A man sobs with joy in the presence of a double rainbow
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(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning December 15
Copyright 2011 by Rob Brezsny
http://FreeWillAstrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The Amazon is the second longest river
in the world, and has such a voluminous flow that it comprises 20 percent
of all river water in the world. And yet there is not a single bridge that
crosses it. I love that fact. It comforts and inspires me to know that
humans have not conquered this natural wonder. Which leads me to my
advice for you this week, Sagittarius. Please consider keeping the wild
part of you wild. It's certainly not at all crucial for you to civilize it.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Emotion is the resource we treasure when
we're young, says poet Naomi Shihab Nye, but eventually what we thrive
on even more is energy. "Energy is everything," she says, "not emotion."
And where does energy come from? Often, from juxtaposition, says Nye.
"Rubbing happy and sad together creates energy; rubbing one image
against another." That's what she loves about being a poet. Her specialty
is to conjure magic through juxtaposition. "Our brains are desperate for
that kind of energy," she concludes. I mention this, Capricorn, because
the coming weeks will be prime time for you to drum up the vigor and
vitality that come from mixing and melding and merging, particularly in
unexpected or uncommon ways.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Studies show that if you're sharing a meal
with one other person, you're likely to eat up to 35 percent more food
than if you're dining alone. If you sit down at the table with four
companions, you'll probably devour 75 percent extra, and if you're with a
party of eight, your consumption may double. As I contemplate your
horoscope, these facts give me pause. While I do suspect you will benefit
from socializing more intensely and prolifically, I also think it'll be
important to raise your commitment to your own physical health. Can you
figure out a way to do both, please?
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): "Were it not for the leaping and twinkling of
the soul," said psychologist Carl Jung, "human beings would rot away in
their greatest passion, idleness." To that edgy observation I would add
this corollary: One of the greatest and most secret forms of idleness
comes from being endlessly busy at unimportant tasks. If you are way too
wrapped up in doing a thousand little things that have nothing to do with
your life's primary mission, you are, in my opinion, profoundly idle. All the
above is prelude for the climactic advice of this week's horoscope, which
goes as follows: Give everything you have to stimulate the leaping and
twinkling of your soul.
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Jim Moran (1908-1999) called himself a
publicist, but I regard him as a pioneer performance artist. At various
times in his colorful career, he led a bull through a china shop in New York
City, changed horses in midstream in Nevada's Truckee River, and looked
for a needle in a haystack until he found it. You might want to draw
inspiration from his work in the coming weeks, Aries. You will not only
have a knack for mutating cliches and scrambling conventional wisdom. In
doing so, you could also pull off feats that might seem improbable.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): One possible way to tap into the current
cosmic opportunities would be to seek out *storegasms* -- the ecstatic
feelings released while exercising one's buyological urges in consumer
temples crammed with an obscene abundance of colorful material goods.
But I advise you against doing that. It wouldn't be a very creative solution
to the epic yearnings that are welling up in your down-below-and-deep-
inside parts. Instead, I offer a potentially far more satisfying
recommendation: Routinely maneuver yourself into positions where your
primal self will be filled up with sublime wonder, mysterious beauty, and
smart love.
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IF YOU WANT MORE FREE WILL ASTROLOGY,
TRY THE EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES
Since I put all my heart and soul into the written horoscopes I send out in
this newsletter, they're pretty nutritious. You may never need any of the
other stuff I create.
But if you ever do crave an added boost, you may want to sample my
Expanded Audio Horoscopes. They're different in tone and intent than the
written scopes, imbued with a little more of the psychologist in me, and a
little less of the poet.
Find out more at http://RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or
1-900-950-7700.
"Your expanded astrology thingees help me remember who I really am." -
Gareth N., Toronto
"I never knew it was possible to get my butt kicked and my head patted
at the same time -- until I listened to you, Rob." -Kristi P., Portland, OR
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GEMINI (May 21-June 20): I'm not an either-or type of person. I don't
think that there are just two sides of every story and that you have to
align yourself with one or the other. That's one reason why, as an America
voter, I reject the idea that I must either sympathize with the goals of the
Democratic Party or the Republican Party. It's also why I'm bored by the
trumped-up squabble between the atheists and the fundamentalist
Christians, and the predictable arguments between dogmatic cynics and
fanatical optimists. I urge you to try my approach in the coming weeks,
Gemini. Find a third way between any two sides that tend to divide the
world into Us against Them.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): No one actually looks like the retouched
images of the seemingly perfect people in sexy ads. It's impossible to be
that flawless, with no wrinkles, blemishes, and scars. Acknowledging this
fact, the iconic supermodel Cindy Crawford once said, "I wish I looked like
Cindy Crawford." Our unconscious inclination to compare ourselves to
such unrealistic ideals is the source of a lot of mischief in our lives. Your
assignment in the coming week, Cancerian, is to divest yourself, as much
as possible, of all standards of perfection that alienate you from yourself
or cause you to feel shame about who you really are. (More fodder to
motivate you: tinyurl.com/SoftKill.)
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Barney Oldfield (1878-1946) was a pioneer car
racer who was the first ever to run a 100-mile-per-hour lap at the
Indianapolis 500. He was a much better driver while setting speed records
and beating other cars on racetracks than he was at moseying through
regular street traffic. Why? He said he couldn't think clearly if he was
traveling at less than 100 miles per hour. I suspect you may temporarily
have a similar quirk, Leo -- not in the way you drive but rather in the way
you live and work and play. To achieve maximum lucidity, you may have
to be moving pretty fast.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Back in August 2010, there was an 11-day
traffic snarl on a Chinese highway. At one point the stuck vehicles
stretched for 60 miles and inched along at the rate of a mile per day. In
that light, your current jam isn't so bad. It may be true that your progress
has been glacial lately, but at least you've had a bed to sleep in and a
bathroom to use, which is more than can be said for the stranded Chinese
motorists and truck drivers. Plus I'm predicting that your own personal
jam is going to disperse sometime in the next few days. Be prepped and
ready to rumble on.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Here's a joke from Woody Allen's movie *Annie
Hall*: "Two elderly women are in a Catskills Mountain resort and one of
them says: 'Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.' The other one
says, 'Yeah, I know -- and such small portions.'" Is it possible you're acting
like the second woman, Libra? Are you being influenced to find fault with
something that you actually kind of like? Are you ignoring your own
preferences simply because you think it might help you to be close to
those whose preferences are different? I urge you not to do that in the
coming week. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, it's
very important that you know how you feel and stay true to your feelings.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The Los Angeles school district dramatically
downgraded the role that homework plays in the life of its students.
Beginning this fall, the assignments kids do after school account for only
10 percent of their final grade. As far as you're concerned, Scorpio, that's
not a good trend to follow. In fact, I think you should go in the opposite
direction. During the enhanced learning phase you're now entering, your
homework will be more important than ever. In order to take full
advantage of the rich educational opportunities that will be flowing your
way, you should do lots of research, think hard about what it all means,
and in general be very well-prepared. The period between late 2011 and
early 2012 is homework time for you.
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HOMEWORK: Make a prediction about what you will do in 2012. Tell me
about it by going to http://RealAstrology.com and clicking on "Email
Rob."
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2011 Rob Brezsny
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