Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter http://ezezine.com
Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
April 23, 2008
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http://FreeWillAstrology.com
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"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a
butterfly."
- Chuang Tse
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My book
*PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA:
How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings*
is available for sale at http://tinyurl.com/qaj62
Here's an excerpt:
AMBIDEXTROUS PRONOIA THERAPY, Part One
Experiments and exercises in becoming a mysteriously truthful, teasingly
healing, fiercely magnanimous Master of Impartial Passion
1. What three ideas do you hate most? Pretend you believe those ideas
devoutly. Write about them as if they were the cornerstones of your
philosophy of life.
2. The Shinto monks of Iso, Japan, have a curious custom. Every 20 years
since the year 772, they've dismantled their central shrine and rebuilt it
from scratch. In so doing, they pass down the knowledge of their sacred
construction techniques from generation to generation. It's also an
effective way for the monks to participate eagerly in the transitoriness of
life, rather than merely being resigned to it. They practice the art of
death and rebirth not just in meditation but through a practical long-term
ritual.
Can you think of an analogous custom you might create for your personal
use?
3. There is a disproportionate abundance of evil stepmothers in traditional
fairy tales. Storyteller Michael Meade believes that's because the
stepmother is a symbol of the soul's nemesis, and everyone has a
nemesis. In fact, he says, we all need a nemesis to keep us honest, to
challenge our assumptions and call our bluffs. With this in mind,
brainstorm a short fairy tale in which you're rearranged during a visit from
a stepmother.
4. We're acquainted with a group of Hell's Angels that has a unique way
of honoring the deceased. Once a year the gang throws a party in the
cemetery where their fallen comrades are buried, pouring beer on and
snorting coke off their graves.
Think about developing a similar approach to dealing with the dead parts
of your own life. Don't just cry mournfully over the dreams and influences
that have helped make you what you are. Dance for them; sing for them;
leap into the air and kiss the sky for them.
5. Oceans are not exactly teeming with life. In fact, they're mostly barren,
and could rightly be called "wet deserts." Likewise, not all your emotions,
even those that come in floods, are fertile. Some are automatic reactions
that have discharged thousands of times since they were first
programmed into you many years ago. They're mechanical, not organic.
They became fixtures when you were a very different person than you are
now. Identify these.
6.We all have a war going on inside ourselves. What's yours? Is it a just
and fruitful war or a senseless and wasteful war, or both?
7. Hundreds of years ago, it was seemingly possible to buy forgiveness.
Until Martin Luther came along to spoil the fun, the Catholic Church used
to sell "indulgences," which buyers could supposedly trade in purgatory
for a reduced punishment for their earthly sins.
The forgiveness freaks at the Beauty and Truth Laboratory have revived
this practice in a mutated form. For the right price, we're able to
guarantee your absolution. To take advantage of our offer, simply send us
a million dollars for each sin you want to have forgiven.
There's just one condition: You can't pay us with the government's legal
tender. You must make the money—literally. Using crayons, paints,
scissors, glue, collage materials, or other media, create your own version
of large-denomination paper money. Instead of the images of politicians
that typically appear on government currency, draw pictures of your
muses and heroes and friends and pets. Rather than patriotic clichés and
meaningless decorative frills, add sayings and symbols that make you
happy. Be sure to write a description of the sin you want "indulged"
somewhere on the bill. Send your payment to the Beauty and Truth
Laboratory at P.O. Box 150628, San Rafael, CA 94915.
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My docu-fiction memoir
*THE TELEVISIONARY ORACLE*
is available for sale at http://tinyurl.com/2ftyq6
and can be read online at http://tinyurl.com/3c2j4x
(Scroll down the page to find the link to Chapter 1)
Here's an excerpt:
Your suffering is interesting and important, beauty and truth fans. No one
can take that away from you. But we don't feel sorry for you. That's not
our style, and it wouldn't help you anyway.
Our slogan is, There are only two healers: death and ecstasy. So as we
flirt with healing you, we have to be sure we're always having fun killing
off some worn-out part of you. If our words seem cruel or self-exalting or
unlike what you've come to expect from healers, don't worry: They still
work just as well. Better, in fact, exactly because we're not boring
ourselves in order to figure out how to pierce your protective coat of
narcissism. We just stay excited about you, and you do the rest.
We're effective healers because we never call ourselves healers. We don't
allow our egos to appropriate and exploit that dangerous image. If
someone accuses us of being healers, we deny it and claim to be poets or
ritualists. Likewise, if someone admires us for being poets or ritualists, we
deny it, professing to be guerrilla therapists or sacred janitors. We don't
really mean any of it. We're just escaping from all the dangerous images
that would force us to become parodies of ourselves -- that would fool us
into being more passionate about the impression we make on you than
being who we love to be.
We know it has all been said and done before, but the difference with us
is that we're not just out to manipulate you into giving us your adoration
and money. We really love you unconditionally. Not sentimentally. Not
ironically. Not as a joke or a con or with the disguised hope that you're
going to owe us big-time. This is not a simulation, beauty and truth fans.
It's real life.
We may tease, but never for our self-aggrandizement. We may prank, but
never to get one-up on you or to jack ourselves up with fantasies that
we're more spiritual than you. We really do want to be in your dreams
helping you carry the garbage out of your nightmares.
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To listen to and get a free download of "Apathy and Ignorance," a song
from my band's CD *Give Too Much,* go here:
http://tinyurl.com/4xt2ch
To buy the CD, go here:
http://tinyurl.com/yqy42p
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OTHER PRONOIA RESOURCES:
A STRONG DOSE OF PURE PRONOIAC EVIDENCE
*Amazing Grace: The Nine Principles of Living in Natural Magic*
by David Wolfe and Nick Good
http://tinyurl.com/4nbcht
This book is offered by the same company that publishes my books. My
publisher says that David Wolfe is the "second most pronoiac person in
the world" after me.
TOWARDS A NEW SPIRITUALITY IN ART
"The Remodernist Manifesto" by Billy Childish and Charles Thomson
http://tinyurl.com/4ltk4z
http://tinyurl.com/3wbtwl
"We don't need more dull, boring, brainless destruction of convention . . .
We need an art that integrates body and soul and recognizes enduring
and underlying principles which have sustained wisdom and insight
throughout humanity's history."
TOWARDS A NEW SPIRITUALITY IN POETRY
"The Kosmic Karma of an Integral Poet" by Paul Lonely
http://tinyurl.com/2s4jvj
"Dear postmodern and contemporary artists of the world: You're trying
too hard. Most of you seem to be dead set on becoming the next 'mad
genius.' And, quite frankly, it's cliché . . . It's high time for a group of
integral artists to transcend the trendiness of self-deconstruction and call
for a global transformation. May I be so bold as to offer a couple new
mantras for the 21st century? Here's the first: Art for Spirit's Sake. Do
you like it? If so, I offer the second: Sanity is the new Crazy. Shadow
work, meditation, yoga, contemplation, prayer, authentic self inquiry.
SANITY is the new Crazy."
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning April 24
Copyright 2008 by Rob Brezsny
http://FreeWillAstrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): "The greatest poverty is boredom," said one
of my teachers, Ann Davies. "The greatest hell is not having a goal." Make
those ideas your touchstones as you carry out a twofold assignment.
First, use all your ingenuity to banish any reasons you might have to feel
bored. Second, invoke your craftiest optimism and wildest discipline as
you identify a goal whose pursuit will move you ever closer to the state
the mystics call heaven-on-earth.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In a study of pop songs, sociologists from the
University of Colorado concluded that love isn't as popular a topic as it
used to be. Bestselling tunes sung by women rarely use words like "care"
and "cherish" anymore, and references to love have declined
precipitously. Meanwhile, male singers ignore love and obsess on sex far
more than they once did, and both genders revel in pain and selfishness
at a higher rate. I tell you this, Gemini, as a prelude to announcing your
assignment, which is to counteract the trend I just described. For the
foreseeable future, be a prolific genius of love, a creator of beautiful
collaborations, an unsentimental devotee of sweet and tender intimacy.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): "Many a man fails to become a thinker for the
sole reason that his memory is too good," wrote Friedrich Nietzsche. I
suggest you contemplate that riddle, Cancerian. Is your ability to stir up
new perspectives sometimes hindered by the deep feelings you have
about your history? Is it possible that past experiences you've grown to
treasure tend to diminish your motivation to reinvent yourself
periodically? If so, it's a perfect time to break free of the old days and old
ways. Induce a little forgetfulness so that you're more available for the
future.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Is there really such a thing as free will, or are our
destinies shaped by forces beyond our control? Here's one way to think
about that question: Maybe some people actually have more free will than
others. Not because they have more money. (Many rich folks are under
the spell of their instincts, after all.) Not because they have a high-status
position. (A boss may have power over others but little power over
himself.) Rather, those with a lot of free will have earned that privilege by
taking strong measures to dissolve the conditioning they absorbed while
growing up. They've acted on the advice of psychologist Carl Jung: "Until
you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will
call it fate." As you enter the phase of your astrological cycle when more
free will is yours for the taking, Leo, meditate on these thoughts.
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AUDIO LOVE LETTERS
In addition to the horoscopes that come to you in this newsletter, I create
more in-depth audio horoscopes for your inspiration. I think of them as
my love letters to you. They're $6 if you access them on the Web, or
$1.99 per minute over the phone.
Try them at http://RealAstrology.com.
They're available by phone at 1-877-873-4888
or 1-900-950-7700.
"Your expanded astrology thingees help me remember who I really am." -
Gareth N., Toronto
"I never knew it was possible to get my butt kicked and my head patted
at the same time -- until I listened to you, Rob." -Kristi P., Portland, OR
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VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The billboard I saw said, "Develop a
recreational habit that won't show up in your urine." I didn't catch what
product it was advertising, but there was an image of a hang-glider, so I
figure it was promoting outdoor sports as a preferable alternative to
taking drugs. The billboard message happens to be excellent advice for
you, Virgo. In the coming weeks, you'll be wise to seek liberating
adventure and explore new modes of natural fun. Doing so will steer you
away from a path that could lead to messy adventure and decadent fun.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Why do people have sex? A study by the
University of Texas found that there are 237 reasons, from "I wanted to
communicate at a deeper level" to "I wanted to boost my self-esteem" to
"I wanted to be closer to God." According to my research, Libra, you're
likely to be motivated by as many as 25 of those factors in the coming
weeks, way up from your average of eight. We might logically conclude,
then, that you may seek out erotic experiences at a rate three times your
norm. (Here's more about the 237 reasons: tinyurl.com/24av4j,
tinyurl.com/22z9ep, and tinyurl.com/346xxp.)
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): "Opinion is really the lowest form of human
knowledge," says educator Bill Bullard. "It requires no accountability, no
understanding. The highest form of knowledge . . . is empathy, for it
requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world. It requires
profound, purpose_larger_than_the_self kind of understanding." In that
spirit, Scorpio, I encourage you to renounce three of your opinions,
preferably those that are least-well-informed and not rooted in first-hand
experience. I also challenge you to carry out a week-long experiment
based on the following hypothesis: Expanding your capacity for empathy
will make you smarter.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Your metaphorical pregnancy has gone
on rather long. No reason to panic. I'm sure your brainchild or masterpiece
will arrive shortly. But just for fun, maybe you could watch a time-lapse
film of a rose opening. That was helpful in expediting the birth process for
two new mothers I know. Here are two other tricks to try, even if the
blessed event you're about to enjoy is purely symbolic: Arrange to be in a
place where a storm is coming on. Folk tradition says that labor often
follows drops in barometric pressure. Or get a hold of rings made from a
rattlesnake tail. Early American explorers Lewis and Clark gave them to
their Native American guide Sacagawea when it was near her time, and
they seemed to magically expedite the baby's arrival.
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AUDIO HOROSCOPES
In addition to the horoscopes that you're reading here, I create more in-
depth audio horoscopes for your inspiration. Find out more at
http://RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or
1-900-950-7700.
"You told me the truth when no one else in my life would." -Darren H.,
Minneapolis
"Your wake-up calls keep me from getting stale." -Arris T., Aspen, CO
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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I've got three messages for you. They may
seem unrelated, but by this time next week you will see that they are
intimately interconnected. 1. Unless you were raised in the woods by
badgers, it's a perfect moment to slip into your second childhood. 2.
Unless you really can't stand having your mind changed, it's an excellent
time to launch a daring project that would have seemed impossible to the
person you were a year ago. 3. People unsympathetic to your cause may
think you're in the throes of delusions of grandeur, but those of us who
have faith in your untapped powers say they're not delusions but viable
fantasies.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): On the San Francisco State University
campus, the lampposts shine blue lights. It's not just a decorative touch.
Of all the colors, blue best pierces through fog, which is a regular feature
in that part of the world. In this spirit, I suggest you install a blue light
bulb in a prominent place in your environment for the next two weeks. It
will be a symbolic reminder that there may be more mental murk and
emotional haze for you to navigate through than usual. With the proper
illumination, you won't be deluded or slowed down a bit.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): *The Washington Post* gave its readers an
assignment: Come up with a statement they'd like to sneak on to
President Bush's teleprompter during a major speech. Chances would be
good that he'd probably just say it, right? The entries included "I shall
make it my duty to eat a kitten for breakfast every day," "Global warming
can be reversed if everyone just turned his air conditioner around," and "I
wish to announce my conversion to Islam." I bring this to your attention,
Pisces, because you're in peril of getting into a situation like that. Unless
you're careful, you could end up saying things you don't mean or
expressing yourself in ways that don't reflect your actual feelings. To
make sure that doesn't happen, concentrate hard on communicating with
maximum clarity and candor.
ARIES (March 21-April 19): The U.S. government is spending over
$500,000 per minute on the war in Iraq. Meanwhile, Exxon Mobil is raking
in about $73,000 of profit per minute. Is there any connection? Though I
have my suspicions, I don't know for sure. I do know that the coming
weeks will be an excellent time for you to phase out any situation in your
personal life that resembles America's cash drain in Iraq. It will also be a
favorable period for you to brainstorm about how you could upgrade your
financial intake to be more like Exxon Mobil's.
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HOMEWORK: For exactly five days, uphold your highest ideal in every little
way you can imagine. Report results by going to
http://FreeWillAstrology.com and clicking on "Email Rob."
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WANT TO GET YOUR CHART DONE?
I'm not doing personal charts, but I highly recommend my astrological
colleague, RO LOUGHRAN. Her approach closely matches my own. In our
many discussions about astrology over the years, we've had a major
influence on each other's work.
Ro utilizes a blend of well-trained intuition, emotional warmth, and a high
degree of technical proficiency in horoscope interpretation; she is skilled
at exploring the mysteries of your life's purpose and nurturing your
connection with your own inner wisdom.
Ro is based in California, but can do phone consultations and otherwise
work with you regardless of geographic boundaries.
Ro's website is at
http://YourSoulJourney.com
She can also be reached at roloughran@comcast.net
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P.S. I totally respect your privacy. I'll never sell or give away your address
to anyone.
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Submissions sent to the Free Will Astrology Weekly Newsletter
or in response to "homework assignments" may be
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2008 Rob Brezsny
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