Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter http://ezezine.com
Rob Brezsny's Free Will Astrology Newsletter
April 25, 2007
http://FreeWillAstrology.com
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"Civilization is a stream with banks. The stream is sometimes filled with
blood from people killing, stealing, shouting and doing the things
historians usually record, while on the banks, unnoticed, people build
homes, make love, raise children, sing songs, write poetry and even
whittle statues. The story of civilization is the story of what happened on
the banks. Historians are pessimists because they ignore the banks for
the river." - Will Durant
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My book
"PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA:
How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings"
is available for sale at http://tinyurl.com/qaj62
Here's an excerpt from the book:
I HAVE A DREAM
I have a dream that in the New World, there will be a new Bill of Rights.
The first amendment will be, "Your daily wage is directly tied to how much
beauty and truth and love you provide."
I have a dream that in the New World, childbirth will be broadcast in prime
time on a major TV network every night.
I have a dream that the New World will have rapturists, and they'll vastly
outnumber the terrorists. The rapturists will be performance artists with a
conscience ... charismatic improvisers who love to spring fun surprises.
They'll commit unexpected interventions and unscheduled spectacles that
delight hordes of strangers.
I have a dream that in the New World, we will add an eleventh
commandment to the standard ten: Thou shalt not bore God.
I have a dream of a week-long annual holiday called the Bacchanalia. Work
and business will be suspended so that all adults can explore their ripe
mojo with frothy erotic experiments. Tenderly orgiastic marathons will
rage unabated. Reverential ecstasy and grateful generosity will rule.
I have a dream that when anchormen report tragedies on their nightly TV
shows, they'll break down and cry and let their emotions show. No more
poker faces.
*
I have a dream that in the New World, plutocracy will be a felony. April
Fool's Day will come once a month. There'll be scientific horoscopes and
mystical logic. Every one of us will have at least one imaginary friend.
Compassion will be an aphrodisiac.
In the New World, we'll launch an affirmative action program that
ultimately makes most of us celebrities. Buddhist real estate developers
will build a chain of sacred shopping centers in the heartland. The CEOs of
the Fortune 500 companies will be required by law to enjoy once-a-week
sessions with Jungian psychotherapists. Pioneers in artificial intelligence
research will develop computers that can talk to God.
In the New World, same-sex marriages will be fully sanctioned, of course.
But why stop there? We'll also legalize wedding bonds among
threesomes, foursomes, fivesomes, and large groups of people who are in
love with each other. I have a dream that we will expand the meaning of
love beyond anything our ancestors imagined.
*
I have a dream that in the New World, Oprah Winfrey will buy up all the
Pizza Huts on the planet and convert them into a global network of
menstrual huts, where for a few days each month, every one of us, men
and women alike, can resign from the crazy-making 9–5—drop out and
slow down, break trance and dive down into eternal time . . .
To read the entirety of "I HAVE A DREAM," excerpted from
*PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia,*
go here:
http://tinyurl.com/22gcko
++++++++++++++++++++++++
To read other news and features from my book, go here:
http://snipurl.com/l9o3
You can buy the book here:
AMAZON
http://snipurl.com/krjj
BARNES & NOBLE
http://snipurl.com/krjn
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
OTHER PRONOIA RESOURCES:
SELF-RETRAINING
*Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life* by Martin E.
Seligman
http://tinyurl.com/2zqbns
GOOD, GENEROUS DANGER
*What Is Your Dangerous Idea?: Today's Leading Thinkers on the
Unthinkable* by John Brockman
http://tinyurl.com/2zby8s
PROTECTING RARE BIRD
The strange and extremely rare Long-whiskered Owlet, Xenoglaux loweryi,
has been seen in the wild for the first time
http://tinyurl.com/29took
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They're not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning April 26
Copyright 2007 by Rob Brezsny
http://FreeWillAstrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
ARIES (March 21-April 19): "If you hold your dreams too tightly, you'll
crush their little ribs," was the message scrawled on the wall of a public
restroom I visited today. I immediately recognized that as excellent advice
for you. While I'm usually all in favor of cultivating a ferocious devotion
towards one's goals and desires, I've noticed lately that your grasp on
yours has turned into a manic clench. Please let them breathe better. Give
them some slack. Maybe tell yourself a joke about how funny you look
applying that death-grip.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): One of the most demanding and exhilarating
transitions of 2007 is coming. Here are five tips to help you get maximum
enjoyment out of it. (1) Be an early adapter, a quick study, and a resilient
improviser. (2) Hang out in places where things are just beginning. (3)
Intensify your commitment to the lessons that spontaneity can bring. (4)
Be a specialist in uprisings and breakthroughs. (5) Give your generous
attention to influences that are pure, innocent, and buoyant.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In the quest for enlightenment, no experience
is irrelevant. Meditating for days in a mountaintop sanctuary may work
well for some seekers, while others are more likely to uncover hidden
truths about the nature of reality as they microwave a burrito in a
convenience store or play soccer in the living room with their drunk
friends, using a rolled up pair of socks as the ball. Even if your spiritual
search usually fits the first description, Gemini, I suspect it will more
closely match the second in the coming weeks. The secrets of the Divine
Wow are primed to reveal themselves to you in the midst of everyday
chaos.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): The U.S. Army has dramatically lowered its
recruitment standards. Since 2004, the number of new soldiers who've
entered the ranks even though they've committed a crime has risen by
over 50 percent. I urge you to move in the opposite direction, Cancerian.
According to my understanding of the astrological omens, your success in
the coming months depends on you raising your expectations, demanding
more excellence, and absolutely insisting on ethical impeccability. If you
have a goal that seems to require you to lower your standards, I suggest
you abandon that goal.
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AUDIO LOVE LETTERS
In addition to the horoscopes that you're reading here, I create more in-
depth audio horoscopes for your inspiration. Find out more at
http://RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or
1-900-950-7700.
"You told me the truth when no one else in my life would." -Darren H.,
Minneapolis
"Your wake-up calls keep me from getting stale." -Arris T., Aspen, CO
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): "Problem-solving is highly overrated," says artist
Chuck Close. "Problem-creation is far more interesting." Whether or not
you're inclined to agree with that assessment, Leo, I invite you to make it
your hypothesis in the coming week. In other words, put yourself in an
experimental mood, and act *as if* problem-creation is where all the
action is. How might your life be different if you were not chronically
worrying about the dilemma of the hour, but instead were always on the
lookout for the next tricky challenge that will awaken sleeping portions of
your heart and mind?
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You're capable of pulling off some
unprecedented mixing and matching in the coming weeks, Virgo. You
could figure out a way to blend oil and water, metaphorically speaking.
And you might find a logical loophole that allows you to reasonably
compare apples and oranges. But those examples represent only the most
obvious ways your skills at juxtaposition could work. You might also, for
example, be a matchmaker for the son of a Saudi Arabian oil magnate and
a Jewish goth performance artist, or convince the Dalai Lama to have a
summit with Paris Hilton.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): On December 10 last year, 36,000 couples got
married in Delhi, India. The mad rush to the altar was prompted by Vedic
astrologers, who decreed that day to be an auspicious time to wed. I
don't know enough about the Vedic system to judge whether its
practitioners would also regard the coming weeks as propitious for ritual
unions. But my reading of the omens says that from the perspective of
Western astrology, it's very favorable for you Libras. If you've been
thinking about deepening your commitment to a trustworthy partner,
you've got cosmic mojo on your side--not just for romantic mergers, but
also for business deals, artistic agreements, mutual oaths, and just about
any splashy adventures in togetherness.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): "Dear Rob: My plan has been to steal the
man I love right out from under his wife's nose without feeling a raging
case of the guilties. Here's what I've discovered thus far: You can only do
something like this if you're not friends with his wife, and if you love the
guy so much that the beating of your heart drowns out the drone of your
conscience. Any advice? -Scorpio Under a Spell." Dear Scorpio: It's rarely
a good idea to break up a committed intimate relationship by stealing one
of its members, but it's an especially unfavorable time to pursue that goal
now. May I recommend instead that you sublimate the urge by seducing
your inner male? It's an excellent time for you Scorpios to get *crazy sexy
deep* with the part of your psyche that feels like the opposite gender.
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This weekly newsletter, which includes my written horoscopes and
excerpts from my books, is always free.
Here are the paid services I provide:
My EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES are weekly spoken-word reports on
your destiny. They're three to four minutes long, and are available at
http://RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or
1-900-950-7700.
My DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES are short, sweet bursts of
illumination delivered seven days a week to your cell phone or other
mobile device. You can sign up for them at http://RealAstrology.com.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Poet Kay Ryan told the *Christian
Science Monitor* that her poems often begin "the way an oyster does,
with an aggravation." Her ultimate intention, however, is to liberate her
readers. "I like to think of all good poetry as providing more oxygen into
the atmosphere; it just makes it easier to breathe." I believe this
progression from aggravation to liberation is a strategy you could
profitably pursue in the coming days, Sagittarius. If you agree to absorb
what's bugging you, you'll ultimately create an expansive new swath of
breathing room for yourself and everyone around you.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In *The Book of Thoth,* Aleister Crowley
says that for Capricorns, the impulse to create can be so strong that it
transcends logic, ignores tradition, and eschews foresight. It might even
be "divinely unscrupulous, sublimely careless of result." Why is this urge
so wild? The formula for Capricorn, he writes, is "the complete
appreciation of all existing things . . . rejoicing in the rugged and barren
no less than in the smooth and fertile." While his assessment might be a
bit extreme, it does contain far more than a few grains of truth--especially
as it applies to you in the coming weeks. Given the current astrological
omens, I believe your will to create will be relentless, majestic, and
primordial.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): According to the macrobiotic approach to
diet, the healthiest food for you to eat is that which has been grown near
you, or at least in the same latitude. Unless you live in the tropics, for
instance, bananas shouldn't be on your menu. Let's make that meme your
Metaphor of the Week, Aquarius. According to my interpretation of the
omens, all your best bets will be local and homegrown. You should pluck
pleasures that are close by, and avoid temptations beckoning from a
distance. You should trust clues that arrive from sources you can
personally verify, and be skeptical of those from friends of friends of
friends.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Summing up his ongoing attempts to
understand the truth about reality, *San Francisco Chronicle* columnist
Jon Carroll wrote, "I am grasping one hair at the end of the tail of a very
large tiger, whose exact nature and intentions are not known to me, nor
will they ever be. I can only hope to describe a few things about the hair.
And I could be wrong." While this is in general an apt description of the
quest most of us are on, I think it's overly modest in light of your current
astrological omens. For the foreseeable future, Pisces, I bet you'll have
the tiger's entire tail in your clutches, and your ability to extrapolate from
it to surmise the nature of the whole tiger will be extraordinary.
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HOMEWORK: Some people ask, "What would Jesus do?" Others prefer,
"What would Buddha do?" Who's your ultimate authority? Testify by
going to http://RealAstrology.com and clicking on "Email Rob."
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WANT TO GET YOUR CHART DONE?
I'm not doing personal charts these days, but I highly recommend my
favorite astrological colleague, RO LOUGHRAN. Her approach closely
matches my own. In our many discussions about astrology over the years,
we've had a major influence on each other's work.
Ro utilizes a blend of well-trained intuition, emotional warmth, and a high
degree of technical proficiency in horoscope interpretation; she is skilled
at exploring the mysteries of your life's purpose and nurturing your
connection with your own inner wisdom.
Ro is based in California, but can do phone consultations and otherwise
work with you regardless of geographic boundaries.
Ro's website is at
http://www.YourSoulJourney.com
She can also be reached at roloughran@comcast.net
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2007 Rob Brezsny
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