Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter http://ezezine.com
Rob Brezsny's Free Will Astrology Newsletter
"Surround yourself with a seedy coffeehouse of intoxicated gods and
their infidel poet-priests and poet-priestesses. Develop a working
relationship with that stunning, bewildering, driving source of mad
desire and infinite depth: the world itself whispering lovely things to
you constantly."
—Revd. MC 900 ft. Escher
http://www.fools-errant.com/~ebeth/deck/major.html
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November 23, 2005
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http://www.freewillastrology.com
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning November 24
Copyright 2005 by Rob Brezsny
http://www.freewillastrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
ARIES (March 21-April 19): The English word "silly" comes from the
German "selig," meaning holy, blissful. In accordance with your current
astrological omens, I invite you to seek out experiences that blend the
ancient and modern senses of the word. For example, explore the
possibility that goofy joy is not at all incompatible with a yearning
for the sacred. Treat yourself to fun that fills you with both
giddiness and reverence.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In ancient Greek myth, Prometheus stole the
gods' fire and bequeathed it to human beings, allowing them to cook,
stay warm when the weather was cold, and make tools and bricks and
pottery. According to my reading of the astrological omens, a
Prometheus-like influence is now hovering at the peripheries of your
world, angling to provide you with a boon that's pretty damn good, even
if it isn't as monumental as fire. There's a catch, however. This
benefactor will not be able to bestow the gift unless you aggressively
ask for it and unless you are alert for its arrival from an unexpected
direction.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): "Our needs are few," said Chinese sage
Lao-Tse. "Our wants are endless." His observation jibes well with my
own belief that life is always conspiring to give us exactly what we
need, exactly when we need it--though not necessarily what we want,
when we want it. Your assignment this week, Gemini, is to get very
clear about the difference between these categories. Write out two
lists, please: a short one of the few substances, influences, and
experiences you absolutely require in order to stay alive and be
yourself, and a monster list of the millions of things that it might be
nice to have but which you can live without just fine.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): "If I had to live my life again," said
actress Tallulah Bankhead, "I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner."
These should be your words to live by in the coming weeks, Cancerian.
In my astrological opinion, the smartest thing you can do is to try the
iffy adventures you've been postponing and experiment with the chancy
turns you've been wondering about. In order to set the stage for your
greatest victories in 2006, you will have to learn lessons that these
potential mistakes can help teach you.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Writing in a recent issue of *The New Yorker,*
Lauren Collins marveled about a novel called *The Apprentice.* It was
published in 1996 by Scooter Libby, the former Bush administration
official who was indicted in October. Though Collins was impressed by
Libby's copious invocations of snot, pus, bad breath, lice, blood, body
wastes, and torture, she was even more boggled by his references to
incest, bestiality, and pedophilia. To fulfill your astrological omens
in the coming week, Leo, you may want to do something similar to what
Collins did: Excavate the past to discover the hidden sides or
little-known qualities of people who have had a lot of power and
influence.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In the coming week, don't eat in restaurants
that serve food you hate, and don't try to operate heavy machinery
while you're reading a book. Sleep on a nice, soft mattress, not on a
piece of plywood covered with nails. Praise and listen to the people
you care about, and resist any urge you might have to call them stupid
and ugly. Spend money on experiences that make you feel good, not on
absurd games that would exhaust you even if you won. It may sound like
I'm telling you what you already know, Virgo, but I'm doing that
because the astrological omens suggest you may be tempted to violate or
override your own common sense in the coming week. I'm just giving you
practice in remembering all the basics.
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AUDIO LOVE LETTERS
In addition to the horoscopes that come to you in this newsletter, I
create more in-depth audio horoscopes for your inspiration. I think of
them as my love letters to you. They're $6 if you access them on the
Web, or $1.99 per minute over the phone.
For Web access, go here:
http://www.relationshipnetwork.com/horo/index.asp?client_id=50700
From the United States, call
1-900-950-7700
or if you prefer to pay by credit card
1-877-873-4888
If you live in Canada, call 1-888-499-4425 to purchase a Block of Time
with your credit card.
"Your audio horoscopes help me tune in to my own inner wisdom. It's
like you're the UNteacher teaching me how to teach myself." —Rose F.,
Ypsilanti, MI
"Why spend $80 an hour on a therapist when I can spend $6 for a few
minutes with you and get the same boost?" —Roger H., Colorado Springs,
CO
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LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): "If it can't fit on a bumper sticker, it's
not a philosophy." That's the message I read on the back of an SUV I
was driving behind today. Now I offer it to you, Libra, because it's
one of those weeks when short, snappy, pithy advice is what you need
most. In accordance with your current astrological omens, here are four
gems to guide you. (1) The road to success is always under
construction. (2) If you must choose between two evils, pick the one
you've never tried. (3) Good taste is the enemy of creativity. (4)
Don't rub the lamp unless you're ready for the genie.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): "There is work that is work and there is
play that is play," said the comic author Gelett Burgess. "There is
play that is work and work that is play. And in only one of these lies
happiness." Your job in the coming weeks, Scorpio, is to increase your
share of work that is play by at least 15 percent; 30 percent would be
better, and is very possible. To inspire your rebellion against the
cultural conventions that insist joyless, fun-free work is supremely
valuable and important, arm yourself with this observation by
creativity expert Roger von Oech: "Necessity may be the mother of
invention, but play is certainly the father."
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Wave farewell to your old self,
Sagittarius. Maybe blow a few kisses as well. But don't linger too
long. Refuse to get bogged down in ambiguous rituals filled with
interminable goodbyes and meticulous inventories of the past. It's time
to go! Off with you! You've got urgent appointments with the unsettling
but fascinating future, and it's best to part ways with habits that
have dulled your initiative and comforts that have numbed your courage.
You're ready for more change than you think you're capable of.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Writing in the *Robb Report,* Jack Smith
reported on the fate of a bottle of 1787 Chateau Lafite claret from
Thomas Jefferson's personal collection. In 1985, it sold at an auction
in London for what would today be $187,000. A few months later, while
it was being displayed, exhibition lights dried out the cork, which
fell into the bottle. The prized collectible was spoiled. The moral of
the story, as far as you're concerned, is this: When you obtain a
valuable resource from the past in the coming weeks, either use it or
protect it from prying eyes. Don't show it off or boast about it.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In 2000, I named "Free Will Astrology" the
Official Horoscope Column of the Sydney Olympics. This year I dubbed it
an official sponsor of the Warped Tour, a festival of 135 alternative
music bands that traveled throughout North America. In my own mind,
"Free Will Astrology Stadium" is now the name of the ballpark where
baseball's San Francisco Giants play, though only a few of my readers
have joined me in believing that. I invite you to follow my example in
the coming weeks, Aquarius: Dream up out-of-the-box approaches to
promoting your own brand or product or service. It's a perfect
astrological time to do as media coach Susan Harrow recommends, which
is to sell yourself without selling your soul. Hey, for the right
price, I might even consider letting one of you be the official sponsor
of the Aquarius horoscopes for December.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): As you slip into astrological prime time,
you'll be shedding inhibitions and becoming more forthright about being
yourself. Secrets that were inaccessible to you until now will finally
reveal themselves, spurring you to peak performances. Exciting insights
you were too timid to own before will erupt, empowering you to express
creativity that has been dormant. There's just one small downside: Your
rise to the next level could attract the disapproval of people who
prefer the safety of mediocrity. My advice? Tell them to go to hell--in
the most tactful possible way, of course. (P.S. For inspiration, keep
in mind this idea from Friedrich Nietzsche: "Those who were dancing
were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.")
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HOMEWORK:
What gifts do you need and want and deserve most this holiday season?
Send me your outrageous demands and humble requests. Go to to
http://www.freewillastrology.com and clicking on "Email Rob."
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2005 Rob Brezsny
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